A Smile is Worth a Thousand Words
by ChibiQuatre
Summary: awwww another Trowa/Quatre ficcie! (i'm known 4 those) well, obviously it's shounen-ai. don't like it? then leave please. no me gusta flames LOL so read on and review peeps. Ja!


A Smile is Worth a Thousand Words  
By ChibiQuatre(6/12/00)  
  
  
  
Yet another GW disclaimer: well, do you all REALLY want me to write a disclaimer?! We all know that I don't own GW (though God KNOWS I wish I did!). The GW boyz r'nt mine, never were, never will b. They are owned by their respective creators; Sunrise, There...happy!!! ((oh, and any trouble translating the japanese, I'll b happy to help!))  
  
*Note: this is my 5th ficcie but only my 1st yaoi. Thanx 2 all those reviews! Especially Shinigami Baby: your comments inspired me to write my 1st yaoi ficcie! BTW, I find nothing against yaoi...if it had 2 b, i'd choose TrowaxQuatre. This is for all those peeps who thought i should write some shounen ai. Pleez tell me whatcha all think! ^-^  
  
  


***  


  
  
I knew there was something about him, this brown-haired boy, the minute he  
stepped out of his Gundam.   
  
He didn't have to; after all, Gundam pilots aren't supposed to be forgiving and  
'weak.' They are only soldiers who fight in a war to win. Soldiers aren't supposed  
to care about others or pity the helpless.  
  
I guess that's what is different about me. Unlike my fellow pilots, I don't act very  
strong or cold-hearted. I guess I'm just being a big baby, but I hate fighting. How  
ironic that I'm doing the very thing that I hate. However, my reason is well  
justified; I'm only doing it because of the promise of peace that the end of this  
war will bring.   
  
That, and those sparkling emerald-sweet eyes.  
  
Those were eyes that I wouldn't mind drowning in. Eyes that I could lose myself  
in for hours on end. Eyes that revealed an abundance of pain and sorrow, but  
also longed for hope and happiness.   
  
Those were special eyes.  
  
Yes, I knew there was something special about Trowa Barton. He was quiet and  
controlled; but underneath it all, he didn't want to be a Gundam pilot. Ne, kids  
aren't supposed to be fighting in wars. Kids are supposed to be given a chance  
at life before they were allowed to witness the effects of death.  
  
And when we first greeted each other from our open Gundam cockpits, I realized  
that this boy, not yet a man, had seen far too much destruction already. Those  
beautiful green eyes weren't--aren't--meant to see the fatal darkness that  
descends upon man in one's final moment.  
  
So I decided to invite him home with me.  
  
Just for the night. Then, if he wanted to leave, well...I would let him. Just give me  
a chance to get to know him better. What secrets are hidden behind those cool  
impartial eyes?  
  
It was a hidden base; I had had a Gundam hangar built near the Winner estate  
and currently used it as my center of operations. For occasions like this, I had  
made sure to make the hangar large enough to store three, even four Gundams.  
Trowa's Gundam HeavyArms would be more than welcome there.  
  
And I trusted him well enough with the location of my desert hideout. For some  
reason, I believed he would respect my secret headquarters. After all, if he  
wanted to kill me, he would have done so already. From what little I saw on the  
battlefield, the Latin pilot could handle situations very nicely.  
  
I was more than surprised when he agreed. Gundam pilots, above all, don't  
accept charities.   
  
But he was lonely, my Uuchu no Kokoro told me; he was only aching for a friend.   
  
I smiled. And I wanted to give him so much more.  
  


***  


  
"Ano, Trowa..." Quatre continued.  
  
I stared at the golden angel in surprise.   
  
Me?? Go home with him? My mind was waging war upon itself, attempting to  
decide whether or not to follow the one called Quatre.   
  
He stared at me with those deep blue eyes, like bottomless pools of crystal  
sapphires, and my mind screamed at me. Go with him! You will find so much  
under his guidance...trust Quatre.   
  
Iie, I thought. It's all a trick. How can someone so innocent be a warrior?   
  
I opened my mouth to reply, then stared wide-eyed in shock. I hadn't meant to  
agree...the words just tumbled out of my mouth. I wanted to say no, to reject  
Quatre's friendship.   
  
It's always the closest to me that get hurt.  
  
But I want him close to me.   
  
He smiled and stepped back into his mobile suit. Sandrock...the perfect Gundam  
for the desert noble. I turned around and did likewise. As soon as the cockpit  
closed, I clicked on the video-communications link. Quatre, my angel savior, was  
already strapped into the safety harness. He smiled at me.  
  
I blinked. Such a sweet and sunny smile, worthwhile of my protection. It made  
my heart jump, my soul twist. What I would do for just that glimmer of sunshine in  
Quatre's eyes...  
  


***  


  
Hn, what a base! Honto, Quatre had it all...wealth, resources, and an endless  
number of servants to wait on his every whim.   
  
What had inspired such a pampered boy to become a heartless soldier?  
  
I shook my head, my hair fluttering in the desert breeze. Soldier he  
was...heartless he was not. Back on the battlefield, he had warned every last  
one of those OZ mobile suits before he attacked. The enemy would not have  
done so in return. Quatre had even apologized to them after they refused to  
listen to his warning. OZ certainly would not have been so gracious.  
  
I stood silently in the shadows of Quatre's hangar, watching him care for both  
Sandrock and HeavyArms. Iie, I stood silently in the shadows admiring the sunny  
Arabian.  
  
For his innocence of believing in me. For his trust of showing me his secret  
desert base. For his kindness of caring for both our Gundams. For, for...  
  
For his sugar-sweet smile, one that was matched only by the rays of the sun  
itself.  
  


***  


  
I lay in the queen-sized bed, wide awake.   
  
The room was pitch black. Every once in a while, the walls would creak with the  
change in temperature, or a band of light would stream in from the hallway.  
  
I thought back on the events of the day. After the battle, the Maguanacs were all  
very kind for repairing my Gundam. The Winner family was lucky to have so  
many loving friends. Even the servants loved the young master.   
  
But then again, who wouldn't love Quatre-sama?  
  
I shook my head furiously. Why do I keep thinking these things? I wanted to yell.   
Quatre is a boy; he just wants to be friends. Don't push things any further.   
  
Don't push.  
  
Demo...  
  
I sighed and sat up, my legs dangling over the edge of the bed. A glance at the  
clock showed that it was 2:37 a.m.   
  
If I don't get some sleep, I won't be able to pilot HeavyArms.  
  
But I couldn't sleep. Not now anyways. I'd been trying for the past few hours, but   
Quatre had burned himself into my mind.  
  
The young heir was all I could see, all I wanted to see. When I opened my eyes,  
he would be standing in front of me in all his radiance. When I closed my eyes,  
his enchanting smile followed me into the darkness, bringing me once again into  
the world of light.  
  
I took a few steps onto the plushy cushioned carpet and walked to the door. I  
needed a glass of water.  
  
Reaching the kitchen, I reached for a glass and poured chilled water from a  
pitcher in the refrigerator. I was reaching to replace the pitcher when...  
  
"Trowa?" I whirled around, almost dropping my glass in the process.  
  
A sleepy Quatre gazed at me through hazy eyes half covered by blond bangs.  
He tried unsuccessfully to stifle a huge yawn. "What're you doing Trowa?"  
  
I felt myself blushing; fortunately for me, the kitchen was lit only by the light  
coming from the open refrigerator door. With my back to the light, Quatre  
wouldn't be able to see my embarrasment turn my face crimson.  
  
Gee, I must be really tired. I didn't even hear him come into the kitchen.  
  
"Ano," I murmured. Remarkably, my voice came out calmly even though I felt like  
I was going to burst from embarrassment. "I, uh, needed a drink if that's okay."  
  
Quatre's eyes widened briefly as he finally spotted the glass in my hands. The  
fog of drowsiness was finally starting to lift from his eyes. He let out an flustered  
laugh. "Of course it's okay Trowa. You may do as you please as long as you're  
here."  
  
'...If you will stay.' Although unspoken, the words hurled against Trowa, almost  
like the blond was pleading with Trowa. They were heard as if Quatre had  
actually uttered them.  
  
Trowa narrowed his eyes. Even with the limited light from the fridge, Quatre  
looked angelic. His hair and pajamas were tousled and mussed. He walked past  
me and bent down into the refrigerator, retreiving an apple.  
  
"Midnight snack," he said softly, duly noticing my confusion, and closed the  
refrigerator.  
  
I watched him as he walked to the sink and washed the apple. Suddenly  
self-conscious, I realized I was staring. The smaller boy's smooth graceful steps  
towards the faucet had bewitched me. I found myself wondering once again what  
had captivated Quatre to fight in the war, to continue fighting.  
  
I sat at the kitchen table, sipping my cold water. The chair to my left slid out and  
I looked over to see Quatre slide down next to me.  
  
He took a bite of his apple and from the corner of my eye, I watched him enjoy  
it's sweetness. Not knowing what to say, I just sat there, absorbing the dark.  
  
Quatre seemed just as content to sit in comfortable silence. Minutes later, he  
finished his apple and looked up at me. I met his gaze.  
  
Without the light from the refrigerator, my perception had adjusted to the black of  
night. Quatre's friendly pair of sapphire jewels bored deep into my heart. There  
was something there...what was it? Gratitude? Happiness?   
  
Love??  
  
I looked back at him evenly although on the inside, I was shocked. It...it was love  
that I saw!! I was sure of it; demo, masaka...  
  
As I sat there pondering in bewilderment, Quatre saw straight through me. Don't  
be afraid, his eyes seemed to say. I couldn't help but stare at him.  
  
Abruptly, he stood up and threw out the apple rind. He started to head back to  
his room, but turned instead. The graceful pilot walked towards me and  
hesitantly put a hand on my shoulder.   
  
I whipped my eyes up to see his pale, milky hand, and lifted my gaze to his face.  
He was standing, no more than a foot taller than I was while sitting.   
  
Quatre was smiling.  
  
At me...he was smiling at me. I felt the last shred of doubt dissolve from my mind  
as his smile melted my heart. I felt my face twitch before it was covered with  
warmth. My lips moved of its own accord as they stretched into a tiny sliver of a  
smile.  
  


***  


  
How long has it been since Trowa smiled?  
  
My smile broadened as I saw the taller pilot's response.   
  
He was smiling.  
  
Ever since he had arrived at my base, he had said barely a word even once. He  
wouldn't laugh or smile, but I knew he was grateful for my hospitality.   
  
Just looking in his eyes, and now seeing this smile, convinced me that I had  
touched yet another soul.  
  
Trowa must have gone through much pain in his past to have developed such a  
strong defense now. Doesn't he know he's surrounded by friends?  
  
I felt so heartbroken that this boy couldn't or didn't want to smile. Smiles are the  
basis of happiness, the foundation of life, and the meaning of living. No one  
could not smile and really live life at the same time.  
  
Trowa Barton may have forgotten the importance of life long ago, but I was going  
to re-teach it to him.   
  
And this was the first step. Smiling.   
  
Trowa had broken that cold mask with a warm smile and revealed his faith in me.  
He was letting me see his hurt and confusion. He was asking me to heal him.  
  
And as far as I was concerned, we were making improvement, ne?  
  
After all, a smile is worth a thousand words.  
  
  
  
~OWARI~  
  
  
  
how was it minna? enjoy?? pleez review...i'd really like to hear your comments and suggestions. and member, pleez b kind 2 me!!! ^^  
  
ChibiQuatre @ tigerlily6c@aol.com


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